There’s enlightenment in the struggle
Ten years ago, my life was 100% different than what you see today. I was coming out of a decade of my life in unhealthy relationships, breaking patterns that had taken that long or longer to develop, in turn tearing my perspective down. I wanted to rebuild myself but I wasn’t sure how the structure was going to develop.
It all started when I went to a Reiki healer who told me that I was living in this unhealthy pattern, mostly with men. She described it as, “going around in circles without the power to get off.” She told me I had “lost myself and my voice, that I needed to begin singing and writing again, I had a powerful strong voice that needed to be heard.”
So I came home looked in the mirror and said, “It’s time Johnna, get off the cycle, break free.”
After doing some research, I bought a book called Mirror Work by Louise Hay, it’s a 22-day book…I did it twice, I highly recommend the book. As I moved through the book, it was shockingly so hard to look in the mirror to tell myself how much I loved ME. And I cried each time, why was it so hard to love myself, I found this process heartbreaking and yet enlightening.
This is when I started telling myself daily, “There’s enlightenment in the struggle.”
We sometimes don’t realize that through the struggle, is often when we are resisting the change. We struggle more and more when we resist what is coming through…perhaps it is a change in lifestyle, business, or relationships, a change that isn’t really wanted, so we struggle through it.
The struggle gets stronger because we’re pushing against the change…whereas, if we let go of the resistance, and accept or embrace the change, it becomes a freedom move! A move for the spirit to open and flourish, rather than forcing yourself to stay small.
We forget that we’re like nature … where the trees bloom, drop leaves, stay bare, then bloom again. Or the seedling that’s planted and takes months or years to grow into full bloom. As a human race, we resist change so much, when it’s our natural way of being, to change, grow, and evolve.
After learning and embracing this perspective, I started following the power of the moon, to work on manifestation and intention setting for attracting what I wanted in my life.
I started small with, the courage to leave my home. I began going to restaurants and networking events alone, I learned certain pieces of jewelry or clothes were my “power outfits” and used them to my advantage.
I moved on to my business, manifesting confidence to talk about myself and promote myself through my business. I educated myself on markets and statistics, things that still are not my strong suit but it was enough. Business calls started coming in, these calls boosted my confidence and taught me healthier communication and expectations.
Then I bit the bullet and decided that I would achieve a lifelong dream of traveling the world…I had the savings, I had the desire and confidence I just needed a means. I knew I didn’t want to do it alone so I wrote this down in my journal, lit a candle, and burned the list. The next day I was presented with a group travel opportunity and I grabbed it with both hands!
I’ve been traveling for almost six months as I write this and have been faithfully working through manifesting and attracting more and more into my life. I have manifested more business each month, a business that is leading me down a different road than originally planned out three years ago, another step off the cycle.
I’ve recognized that everything that’s supposed to be in my life, is in my life.
Recently, I promised myself to follow my intuition when she led me, I haven’t been led astray at all by this. I’ve welcomed the idea of not resisting so much or for so long and seeing the signs within myself of when I am in resistance mode.
Perhaps this is you, are you learning the signs of yourself, to show you when you’re in unnecessary resistance, and where you can begin to let go?
Learning to work with the energies of the seasons and the moon has benefited my life beyond what I can describe.
I’m in a season of a high right now and strengthening this power for a time that I will one day be in a low, developing skills, love, and trust within myself to use when I’m not feeling at my strongest.
Having listened to the message from the Reiki healer and stepping off the cycle, with one foot at a time; each step has taken me to a love for myself.
I am breaking cycles of unhealthy patterns and have moved past surviving, into thriving.
I am loving myself and my life, moving through change and welcoming it as a teacher rather than a cock-block to what I want. Because let’s face it, you don’t always get what you want, but you will get what you need, what you believe you deserve, or what you’ve manifested through your vibration.
What you put out is what will come back to you…it’s the age-old philosophy of karma.
Karma doesn’t just apply to your actions, but the thought, intent, and vibration of those actions. When you live more inside a state of gratitude, being grateful for all that you have and sending energy to the good parts existing in your life, will boost this manifesting vibration. It will boost and produce more of those aspects you do wish to call in, they will organically and naturally come into your life.
However, when we live as our society has been living, in states of fear or lack, we give energy to the things that we don’t have, perpetuating cycles of trauma, abuse, struggle, unhappiness, etc.
The Universe operates off vibrations, it doesn’t speak a language that we can hear, it doesn’t know your innermost secrets or desires, it only knows your vibrations. In order to shift this, you can ask yourself…
What cycle have you stayed in too long?
What pattern do you keep repeating despite wanting a new resolution?
What is no longer serving you that you’ve become afraid to let go?
What vibration are you operating within and how is it affecting your life?
Get off your cycle. Let go of the shit that hasn’t served you.
It’s time to give to yourself.
So give.